You've just made the huge step of moving in together or getting married. Congratulations! Now, what's next? The dream of hot sex whenever you want it. Splitting the finances 50/50. The possibilities are endless.
I hear this all the time, 'is he/she the right one for me?' In a time where there are more single people than there have ever been, and there is more betrayal than ever. People have a hard time trusting that they will pick the right partner for themselves. The first step is loving and respecting yourself. Here are nine tips that will help you know you're in the right relationship:
After you've been in a relationship for a while, it's easy to focus on the negative. At The Gottman Institute we call this the negative sentiment override (NSO). Couples that are in the NSO will not notice the positive their partner does 50% of the time. What does this mean? Start adding thank you's and appreciations to your relationship, like it was in the beginning. I know this sounds small, but it will make a big difference. Here are 10 helpful tips to overcome the NSO in your relationship:
When we think of intimacy, we think of passion and romance. It all seems so natural and easy. I mean, just watch the movies, all you have to do is wear a nice outfit and smell nice, and instantly you'll have romance. It all appears, so, easy. We have learned a lot about relationship stability from Dr's. John and Julie Gottman. We have found that relationships are built on trust and commitment. When you have trust and commitment you have a strong friendship. Friendship builds intimacy. We have also found, that in relationships there can be resentments and grudges. These can be damaging to the relationship. When you learn to mange them well, this can lead to increased intimacy. We can think of them as falling into three different categories:
"When we give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed." Maya Angelou
As many of you know, I see many couples in my practice. One thing I hear a lot from the couples I see is that, "I wish it could be like it was when we first met." To many couples this may sound difficult, but it actually isn't. You can rekindle the spark and bring fun back into the relationship. Here are ten ways to stay engaged after marriage: